It seems that I am still getting those feelings occasionally that I often felt with my PTSD. The feelings of extreme stress and being overwhelmed by everything. Well, not really everything, it’s just the enormity of it makes it feel like everything. That feeling that as hard as I try I just can’t shake it off. The most annoying part of it is that I don’t know what is bothering me. That sounds absolutely ridiculous to feel like that and not know why, but it’s true. That’s just the way it is. To be honest I have given up trying to understand days when I feel like that. During my therapy last year, my therapist told me that feelings are feelings. They are not always rational or helpful, but sometimes they are just there. It doesn’t really matter whether I have reason to feel like that or not, because feelings don’t always make sense. So I shouldn’t blame myself or feel bad about it. Just try and help myself to feel better if I can.
So here I am, dealing with these feelings in the best way that I know, by blogging. It may not be the most interesting or helpful thing for people to read. But it is very helpful to me. And just maybe somebody else will come across it and will be able to relate to it. If that does happen then great! I think… not great that somebody else has these annoying feelings, but great that they will now know that they are not alone in it. So I think this is just a short one for tonight. I just needed to clear my head, so here you go! Thank you for reading.
So let’s think about a positive note to end on…
I managed to get my charm bracelet sorted today, which my lovely boyfriend bought me for Christmas. ❤ He also bought me a charm for Valentine’s Day, which I couldn’t figure out how to put the charm on. I haven’t had one of these before. So I got the people at the shop to show me how to do it and they put it on for me. With two charms and two sparkly stoppers my bracelet is felling up very nicely. 😀 And that was the best part of a very strange day.
xx ❤ xx