Her – The Dark Side of My Mind

For years now I have been in a battle with Her, the dark side of my mind. The side of my mind that is full of negative thoughts. Throughout this time I have thought of this side of me a bit like a different person, like an evil twin. There’s the real me and then…

Coronavirus Diary – Page 15 (New Year, New Lockdown)

I should really start this post by saying Happy New Year, but I’m really not feeling it this year. Obviously I really hope that you do all have a great new year, but I’m not feeling so optimistic. Every new year’s eve I send everybody a text at midnight to wish them happy new year,…

How to Feel a Virtual Hug

Since the pandemic started last year, a hug is something that I don’t think any of us will take for granted again. We used to be able to hug complete strangers at new year and now we can’t even hug our loved ones. This is one of the things that I have struggled with the…

Dressing Positively

A month ago, me and my boyfriend decided to have an online date night for our anniversary. We haven’t been able to see each other for eight months now because of Covid, but we weren’t going to let our special day get missed. So we did everything we could to celebrate without actually seeing each…

Coronavirus Diary – Page 14 (Social chaos)

This week I was supposed to be on holiday in sunny Spain. Because of Covid -19 this hasn’t happened and it is not likely to happen any time soon. Even though we were not going away, me and my family decided to try and have a few days out together. Yesterday we decided to go…

Discovering Video Calling

Over the past few months video calls seem to have taken over just about everything. Calling friends, work meetings, TV shows, hospital appointments, they are all being done over a video call. It seems to be the safest way to see other people. We haven’t been able to meet in person because of Covid-19, so…

Understanding and Accepting My Mind

The other day somebody on TV was talking about her mental health and how she has learned to own how she feels and accept the bad days. This got me thinking about my mental health and how in January this year I thought that my PTSD (Post traumatic stress disorder) had been cured forever. It…

Hey PTSD, You’re back!

Going into the lockdown my post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) has started to show it’s ugly mug again. The trauma I experienced was seven years ago. I spent three months in hospital and was in and out of critical care three times. I am obviously really thankful for this, because it saved my life. But…

Coronavirus Diary – Page 12 (Almost there)

Today the announcement was finally made that England would be easing the lockdown even further. It’s very complicated, but in some ways things should start to feel more normal soon. In other ways they will not feel normal at all because of all the social distancing measures that have been put in place. From July…

Coronavirus Diary – Page 10 (Looking to the future)

A few friends have been asking me what I am looking forward to when the lockdown is over. The truth is, just normal every day life. I want that back so much, but here is a list of things that I can’t wait to get back. Freedom – I can’t wait to be able to…